I have noticed “100 Things” on many blogs. People simply list 100 things about themselves and it is surprisingly interesting to read. So many people have this that I am beginning to think it is a sort of required blog topic. Now, I’m not going to kid myself into thinking I could sustain your interest through a list of 100 things, so I’ll start with 10. Bear in mind I am doing this in spite of the fact that I have been accused of being narcissistic since I started blogging, which doesn’t seem entirely fair. I mean, were Anne Frank or Samuel Pepys narcissists? Ok, maybe Pepys. I’m just trying to be the very best blogger I can be. So here is my list, in no particular order which, I know, can be a little anticlimactic; nevertheless:
1. Until I was a teenager I hated tomatoes. But then I realized people got so much joy from eating them that I must be missing something. So I started eating them and now I like them. I still hate beets, which I once gagged from disgust on when my babysitter made me eat them. That babysitter’s name was Cheryl.
2. It’s not so much that I don’t know how to do my hair as it is just that I get tired of doing it before it is “done.” If you’ve seen me, you’ll know what I’m talking about. If not, you ain’t missing much.
3. Everyone has already heard this but I love telling it: a few years ago I was standing on the bed and walked into a [running] ceiling fan which sliced up my head and spattered blood everywhere necessitating a head stapling at the emergency room. The resulting scars, which act like cowlicks, are some of the reasons I get tired of doing my hair before it is “done.”
4. I have a few odd beliefs concerning my senses. One is that my sense of smell “goes off” at night and does not return until I am fully awake. The other is that my taste buds become desensitized to the taste of Frosted Flakes after one bowl, rendering the second bowl bland and disappointing. I have done tests with reproducible results, but I know most people won't believe me.
5. I teach English part-time at BYU, but am currently taking a semester off to blog full-time. I hesitate to say this because it will undoubtedly invite comments about my spelling and questionable grammar usage, but it is true.
6. I am a proponent of the singular usage of “they” to avoid sexist pronouns. This is very radical, I know, but it’s a good idea for many reasons.
7. I am compulsive about revising my blogs. Sometimes I will delete a post all together. I realize this is bad form, but it’s better than smoking—which is what David Sedaris does in order to not lick light switches. While I feel ok about deleting the occasional blog in order to quiet the voices in my head, I regret deleting the only blog Robbie ever commented on. But I think he understands that I’m a temperamental artist and people are bound to get hurt.
8. I don’t really ski, but that will soon change. Don't even start on the whole Utah/ski thing. I am ashamed of this and taking steps to correct it.
9. I floss, but not enough. I’m not proud of this but I hope that my honesty and imperfection will make people like me more, in spite of my receding gums.
10. I steal all my blogs from other blogs.