Today I went to Walkers to get 44 oz of Diet Coke. Next week I will be at Girl's Camp where there will be no Diet Coke. They say girl's camp is a little piece of Heaven here on earth and I believe this is true in so far as you carry all your earthly vices and addictions with you to Heaven just like you carry them with you to girl's camp. When I walked in an old man greeted me enthusiastically with "What are you after!?" It was obvious from the look he gave me that he thought he recognized me but I am certain I did not know this man. Playing along, I smiled back enthusiastically and replied "Diet Coke!" He chuckled--this must have been some kind of private joke this man and the person he thought I was shared. Hoping it would be over soon I brushed past him and proceeded to get my drink.
Unfortunately, this man (as you may have already imagined) was the sort who makes it a practice to chat up convenience store clerks. I was dragging out the coke-getting process as long as I could but it couldn't reasonably take much longer and I realized I would have to either continue to act like the person this man thought I was--which could end awkwardly or--I don't know what--level with him? I didn't know what to do. My religious upbringing did not fail me and before I even thought about what I was doing I had offered up a fervent prayer: "Please bless that I will have no further interaction with this man." It worked. When I looked up he was gone. Thank you.
Anyway, next week while I'm at girl's camp if it behooves you to pray for moisture please specify, "Diet coke."