Thursday, November 01, 2012
I Hate This For a Thousand Reasons
Bridgit Mendler - Blonde on Disney Video
The singing sounds horrible, the lyrics are ri-DONK-ulous. The tired sentiment of the song is neither adorable nor interesting. This is a counterfeit of music. (And I say that as someone who genuinely likes Call Me Maybe and thinks it's legit.) The studied self-consciousness. The contrived quirkiness. The lyrical conceits that you can barely pull off if you're Bruno Mars but you don't get to try if you're Teddy on Good Luck Charlie. I hate all of it.
But what bothers me most--what makes my blood boil--is that Bridgit Mendler pretends to be Bjork only when she can't hit the high notes. Sorry kid, that's not allowed. Bjork pays the price of being Bjork with psycho-freakazoidness--It's not a convenience she calls upon when her voice cracks.
The fact that my daughter Ellen thinks this is the best thing in the world fuels my rage.