Thursday, February 25, 2010

When Can I Take My Spanks Off?

Our friend Jennie was invited to be on a show about blogging on BYUTV. They flew her out from Austin, gave her a rental car, a hotel room, and a per diem. As part of her segment, they wanted to have her meet one of her blogging friends IRL. She chose me, which was nice. Even though I feel like I've already met her. So last night I went to the LDS Motion Picture Studio to be in a really short segment where I "meet Jennie."

The evening started as I found my way from the parking lot to the studio and a truck drove by and splashed a big mud puddle into my face. I thought I would be working with students from KBYU who were practicing with a pretend show. I asked my "producer" what her major was and she told me she wasn't a student, she was a professional. I guess it was rude of me. Then again, I was there and not at home eating beef stroganoff and wearing pajamas so I feel that she should give me the benefit of the doubt.

I was immediately sequestered so Jennie wouldn't see me. Maybe you think I'm being really modest and down-playing something that was extremely glamorous and enviable. I sat in the break room alone for an hour.

It was decked out in sweet mid-century modern toaster ovens.
Someone has a crush on Edward!There were professional bloggers there to be interviewed for the show. I could hear them cavorting with Jennie. Later I met them briefly: Kadi, Mindy, and Daphne.

Eventually someone came to put a microphone on me and give me an earbud. They re-use the ear buds, by the way. The sound guy didn't really respect my modesty. I was embarrassed because I was wearing my Spanks, which are flesh-colored and come with bra-spenders. I did not want to expose them to the professional producer. But I think she saw. I didn't care about the sound guy because he was fat. (I mean, surely he wouldn't judge me for wearing Spanks.)

Then I waited on a couch by a little Moroni statue for a while. Next to the little Moroni statue were even littler ant traps.

The producer gave me a card for free dinner at Cafe Rio as payment for my time. Cafe Rio is a thrill and I appreciate it. Remember when I was talking about how you might think I'm minimizing my role in all of this and playing it down to sound humble about my TV appearance?

Jennie: flight, hotel, gift basket, rental car, per diem.
Kacy: Cafe Rio gift card, lonely break room, ant traps, mud puddle.

Things picked up after I met Jennie. When I came out I said, "Jennie, I am real." I don't remember anything else. It was short. The other bloggers were interviewed individually about blogging professionally. I noticed that the teleprompter said this:
I guess it is common to abbreviate on teleprompters because it said "everybody" instead of "everybody except Kacy." So when everybody [except me] went back on TV I sat alone in the make-up room for a while and then I thought, "Oh. I guess I can go home now." So I did. Later I got dessert with Jennie. It was probably the most glamorous part of the night [for me] [but not for her].

Before everyone [except me] went back out to the couch Jennie and I got to hang out a little.

My second favorite thing about that night was when Jennie got me a Diet Coke out of the cooler. (My first favorite thing is that gray wig in the background.) I learned something about myself that night at the LDS Motion Picture Studios.I learned that I like to boss Jennie.
What can I say? It was quite a night.


  1. When you are the most famous mommy blogger you can buy and sell all those people and their lousy ant traps.

  2. I had lunch with Jennie that day! And then she went off to meet you. Somehow, I feel slighted. Wait. No, I don't.

    Yay! Gray wig!

  3. I almost asked you to put on that grey wig for a picture! But I forgot!

    I still like you even though you spelled my name two different ways in this post.

  4. I spell Jennie "d" "i" "v" "a."

  5. wow- the lds film studio is kinda ghetto, isn't it?

  6. caffeinated Diet Coke at BYU?? Say what?

  7. When can we stop calling it "MOMMY" blogging? I hate that. Is there anything in the world that's "DADDDY"? Stupid.

    I also hate it when people think it's such a treat to be on tv that they make you "pay for it." (Do I sound like a jaded actress whose gone to too many auditions and gotten not a lot of jobs? Because that's the tone I intended.)

  8. I agree that "mommy blogger" is a condescending term. One of the pro bloggers I met calls herself a digital mom. I like that. I also like "mutha b-er."

  9. Yikes. That's really disappointing to me. They should have at least paid for your gas money.
    Well, chalk it all up to experience.

  10. this is one of my favorite posts you have ever made. probably because of the "mutha b-er" inclusion at the last minute.

  11. I followed cjane's links to you and laughed out loud at this post like 5 times. Which I think might be a record for me. It takes a lot to get an LOL out of this one.

    ant traps, gray wig, lonely make up room....oh my, can't wait to read more :)

  12. THERE WERE DIET COKES IN THERE? I am so gonna donkey-punch that guy who kept asking if we needed anything.

    And I wanted to wear that wig more than anything I've wanted in a long time.

    I'm sorry they didn't cover your gas. They didn't pay us, just our car, air, and hotel. It's still expensive for us to be away from home and kids, not earning, esp when you're the sole support. I was so jealous of everyone else. They had HUSBANDS. I was wide-eyed.

  13. Oh and I love SPANX so. If I could have worn them I would have but there was the chance I'd have to drop trou. We had to bring three different wardrobe options.

    We were all violated with the mike, part of the biz. On the set, I had my hand up the back of Daphne's dress, dialing her volume down so many times I wanted to buy her dinner.

    I loved that they kept saying to put it in your "boob crack." I kept chiming in with, "Remember in 16 Candles? The lipstick trick? Put it there. And please stop saying 'boob crack.'"

  14. I don't care that they didn't pay me! My gas money would have been like 2 cents because I live 5 minutes away from the studio. I'll be sitting pretty at Cafe Rio tomorrow night.

  15. The lipstick trick was in The Breakfast Club, wasn't it?

    You are the only one on that famous list that I am familiar with. I hope that doesn't offend anyone. It shouldn't.

  16. I really love your coat.

    And this post.

  17. Next time I see you remind me to get your autograph. I always knew you'd be famous. First an article in Parent Magazine, now this!!

  18. Anonymous4:35 PM

    I'm not sure whether I had any aspirations to appear on television before reading this post. But if I did, they're gone.

  19. They probably didn't bring you back out because you were wearing white and they were shooting digital. See, it had nothing to do with you, personally.

    The LDS MPS is a palace compared to this great studio in Reno that still has a basket of L'Eggs and Dial anti-perspirant in the dressing room from 1973. Orange shag. Pictures of Bill Cosby in a satin jacket. A burned jeep in the gravel driveway. I wish I had pics for you.

    About the Diet Coke: Crew rules trump BYU rules. Crew rules state there must always be Diet Coke on set and if it's a swanky production, Diet Dr Pepper or Coke Zero. Lisa can attest...

  20. Amen Lisa. I HATE the term "Mommy Blogger." Sorry, Mindy. It is so demeaning. Don't ask for reasons.

    Also, I'm sorry that the day was such a bummer for you. I really wish I had been invited to dessert so I could have chatted with you both some more.

    Also, you are welcome to come on my show someday and I will treat you like the princess you are!


  21. I'm still kinda impressed with you. Or maybe I just really want the Cafe Rio. We don't have those here.


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